RANDY "THE ROCK'N'ROLL DOULA" PATTERSON

“If I could transform my shitty history of a dirty kid on welfare, who smoked weed, listened to heavy metal, dropped out of high school, and didn’t achieve much of anything, into a story about a down-and-out-but-deceptively-smart chick who gets her shit together, marries her soul mate, raises confident daughters with amazing self-esteem, creates a clean and loving home, and runs a successful business, without sacrificing my love for tattoos, hot pink stilettos, and Metallica, then you can surely create some new history that better defines you, too.” – Randy Patterson, The Matriarch Rules